I know that some may not find this to be something that they would want people who do not know them very well to know....But here it goes anyway.
In 2005 I took my GED test and I failed the math. I didn't have a good support system to go back and try again, so I basically said to myself "screw it, you're stupid." And never tried again.
Since having gained independence that my husband showed me I could have, I have done so many things I thought I would never do.
Now being a working Mother of six and seeing that I am always pushing education on my children as being the number one priority in their lives, I've always had this sense of being a hypocrite. Number one, I didn't graduate high school. Number two, I didn't even get my GED.
Everything that I've learned in life has been self taught. But when you stick a math paper in front of my face I am going to look at you like you've just handed me something in hieroglyphics and asked me to translate. I just can't do it!
Today I called CSC and I've talked to Mr. Carlos that is doing intake. I've dealt with him before, and he went on the importance of completing the classes because of state funding and so on and so forth...because he had asked me if I had ever attended class before. After he had spoke to me about the importance, I gave him a little bit of my background to let him know *why* I did what I did.
I am not trying to make excuses for my failure. But when you're 17 years old with a baby and a boyfriend that doesn't really care what you do just as long as you're home to cook dinner by the time he gets off work.....You're really not going to do much with your life. I could have. But I had never been taught different. Women stay home with the kids and men go out and work and bring home the bacon...(I made a funny, my ex works for Farmland)
In October I will be taking classes to prepare myself for the GED testing. I don't know when I will be prepared but I believe with the help of my family and friends that I can accomplish anything. I have an amazing support system that I know will be here for me whenever I need them.
And now I will tell you why I am not embarrassed to tell my readers...
I want everyone to know that I am not the same person I once was 10 years ago. Yes, I make mistakes and yes I do sometimes say and do things that aren't necessarily something that should be said or done....I am human. But I have the confidence the size of five hundred elephants stacked on top of each other.
The fact that I *know* I can do anything that I put my mind to, is something that I am so damn proud of. That's something that no one could take from me. It is mine.
Until next time......
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